Most of us, if not all, have made dozens of New Year’s Resolutions in our lifetime. Things from joining a gym to get in better shape, to taking up a new hobby to help rejuvenate us, being intentional about staying connected with loved ones, or saving money for that dream vacation … our list goes on. And no doubt, while the desire to begin these new important endeavors was strong, somewhere along that journey we probably got worn out and might have even given up on what we once hoped to achieve.
One reason why we find it difficult to achieve our goals is not because they are too lofty, but because we often do not have a concrete course of action to help us reach those goals. The goals that we are intentional about planning how exactly we are going to achieve are the ones that we find most successful. If growing in holiness is a goal of yours this year, then here are just five concrete ways in which you can actively work toward achieving that goal.
Secure a Supportive Surrounding The company we keep is important. If you need convincing, read Luke 5:17-26, where Jesus heals the paralyzed man because of the faith of his friends. Without the help of his friends, the paralyzed man would never have encountered Jesus. Finding a group of friends who share the same goals as us matters because the people we surround ourselves with will be the ones who will either encourage us or discourage us when things get difficult. As the saying goes, “we are who we hang out with,” because the people we hang around help to shape, either positively or negatively, our habits, behaviors, and even how we see things. Accountability helps to keep us honest. Being in the presence of others who desire heaven gives us the space to listen and speak with those who are working toward the same goal. You should know that securing a supportive environment might mean that we will have to cut ties with current acquaintances who make growth in holiness difficult. We have to be willing to ask the tough question, “Does that person bring me closer to God, or push me further away from God?” Good discernment will help us to answer that question honestly and to take the right course of action.
Adopt A Saint Keeping good company is important, so what do we do about the times when we are physically away from those who help us to pursue our heavenly goal? For this, we have the communion of saints, God’s intimate friends, who can do the same for us as our earthly friends. If we want to be holy, then we must have examples held up for us of what holiness looks like in our particular state of life. Seeing other men and women in similar situations to ours, and how they overcame what we also face, not only gives us a path to follow, but also hope that with God’s grace, we too can overcome them.
But how do we keep good company with the saints when there are so many of them out there? Instead of “speed dating” through the diverse and extensive liturgical calendar where the church highlights men and women each day on their feasts, slow it down and adopt a saint for the entire year. Even if you already have a patron saint, your saint will not mind sharing you with others. Place several names of saints that you find to be interesting or helpful in a hat. On New Year’s Day, pull one name and spend the rest of that year learning about that saint through books that have been written about his or her life either by that saint or by others. Find devotions or prayers that the saint might have prayed or personally written. Spend time asking that saint for help. Become his or her friend. Remember that there are benefits to being around others who are not like us, so do not be afraid to mix it up with people who are not like you. There is beauty and growth not only in the complementary, but also in contrast.
Make A Monthly Confession Authentic holiness does not happen without first repenting from our sinful ways which keep us from God. Advent reminds us of this when we read about the ministry of John the Baptist. This forerunner of Christ goes out into the wilderness to prepare the way of the Lord by preaching about repentance (Matthew 3:1-12). True repentance is an acknowledgement of our sins with a desire to turn away from those sins and turn back to God.
As Catholics, we live out our ongoing conversion through the sacrament of confession where we encounter God’s love and mercy. Our guilt and sin are cleansed and we are given God’s grace to overcome our sinful inclinations. Regular confessions are key to growing in holiness. Think of the routine oil changes or tune ups that are needed for our vehicles in order to keep them working at their best. The same is true for us. Our spiritual lives need tuning, and we are at our best when we are in a state of grace, which comes from confession. However, a good confession begins before we walk into the confessional; it begins with an honest and thorough examination of where we are in relationship with God.
Make a Nightly Examination Just like routine confessions are important, so too are daily examinations as they help us to make a good confession by bringing to light what is often left in darkness. Examining our consciences daily helps us to keep a current list of where exactly we need God’s grace in our lives. When we go to the physician, it is helpful to the one treating us if we can pinpoint exactly where the pain is occurring, how long it has been occurring, and where we think it started. The same is true of confession. The more we bring to the sacrament, the better the divine physician can heal our sinful wounds through our awareness of what needs to be done or avoided. Nightly examinations are a great tool because they allow us the opportunity to go over our day and see where God was and where we missed his calling. Confession is not just for the big sins, but also for the smaller ones. God wants to heal everything. Keeping a list on hand to bring with us when we go to confession is not a bad idea either so that we do not forget anything. With our list handy, we are better prepared for the moment when the Holy Spirit moves us.
Draw Close to the Eucharist Finally, there is no growth in holiness without God. The Church reminds us that the Eucharist is the source and summit of our faith (CCC 1324-1327). This is true because the Eucharist is not a thing to be taken, but a person to be encountered and received. The Eucharist is Jesus Christ, the Word of God who became flesh for you and I so that God could make his dwelling among us forever. In the Eucharist, Christ keeps his promises that he will not leave us orphaned (John 14:18) and that he would be with us for all time (Matthew 28:20). It is in the Eucharist that he waits for us to come to him so that he can fulfill our deepest desires. All of us at some point have experienced the daunting truth in the famous words of St. Augustine that remind us that our hearts are truly without rest until we are resting in the Lord. We have to make time, outside of the one hour that we spend with him in Mass, for God. It is only in his presence that we can come to truthfully see what God sees in us. Time with God is time well spent. As time is valuable to us, this will require us to be intentional about when we are going to pray. That means putting it on our calendar and not letting anything else distract us from that appointment. It means we will have to say no to certain things and people, which is never easy, but a no to them means we are free to say “yes” to God. Our relationship with the Lord should be the most important resolution we set out to achieve, and it is one worth keeping. (Father Rusty Bruce is the administrator of St. Hilary of Poitiers Church parish in Mathews and the Community of St. Anthony in Gheens.)