As a child, you would have heard me moan and groan about this season of penance. Today, it is one of my most treasured seasons of the whole liturgical year. The secret to my change of heart about this season was having to teach my young children about it.
Children make us see life in the simplest terms. The same happens when teaching them the Catholic Faith. I vividly remember the first time I had to explain the Passion and Death of Christ to my three-year-old. She was terrified. “I’ve traumatized her!” I thought. BIG PARENT FAIL. After that, my daughter would burst into tears and scream every time she saw a crucifix - which was several times a week. I told myself there had to be a better way to teach my children about Lent, about sacrifice, about the beauty of the Cross. And so, the Holy Spirit gave me the answer in prayer one day as a young mother of three littles. The answer was simple. Teach them about the Passion in light of the Resurrection. It made so much sense. I had always separated the two seasons, but when I truly reflected on it, I realized that Lent makes no sense without Easter. Lent without Easter would make anyone moan and groan, and it would result in empty sacrifice without joy or purpose. A new fire was lit inside me. I no longer dreaded the question my children often asked: Why did Jesus have to die? I taught them the simple Truth: Jesus died so He could open the gates of Heaven for us. He didn’t stay in the grave! HE ROSE! I always make sure to make a big deal about Jesus’ resurrection. I’ll explain to my children that it’s okay to be sad that Jesus died, but we should be happy because He didn’t stay in the grave.
We make Lent meaningful in our family by celebrating it with the knowledge that Easter comes. We marry the two seasons together for our children because separating them doesn’t make sense. To celebrate means to acknowledge a significant event with an enjoyable activity. It takes understanding that the Crucifixion is necessary for the Resurrection to get to a place where we can celebrate Lent instead of dreading it. It is a reverent and penitential season, but it can and should be celebrated with activities. Here are some things we have done in the past or currently do with our children to bring alive the beauty of this season in our home.
The three traditional pillars of Lent are prayer, fasting, and almsgiving. We plan our prayer, fasting, and almsgiving appropriately for the ages of our children as they grow. We have three children now. Addiline is 8 years old, Archer is 6 years old, and Karoline is 5 years old. With the help of the Holy Spirit and many trails and errors, we now have a purpose to the way we observe Lent.
Because we celebrate Lent in light of the Resurrection, we increase our prayer because we want to be as holy as we can so we can enter the gates Jesus died to open for us. Prayer can look like an array of things with little ones. Coloring, crafting, reading Scripture, and attending Stations of the Cross are a few things we love doing with our children. You can also add prayers to an already established routine or begin a new prayer routine. When our children were very small, this is the first prayer we taught them: “Thank you, Jesus. I love you, Jesus. I trust in you, Jesus.” As they grow, we add prayers such as the Saint Michael Prayer, Hail Holy Queen, and Morning Offering.
The second pillar is fasting. The Church gives guidelines on the requirements for fasting when it comes to adults, but parents can choose what fasting looks like for their children. We have started our children with tiny sacrifices on Fridays. For example, they choose a different snack, not their favorite on that day or drink water instead of juice or a fun, sugary drink. They can also fast from television or electronics (iPad time or Nintendo time). Fasting must have a purpose. So, when we fast or make a small sacrifice, it is offered up for a specific person. At night, we share which person we sacrificed for that Friday.
Finally, the third pillar is almsgiving. Many people think of money as a source of almsgiving, but the Church teaches that we can give our time, our talent, or our treasure. So, what can children offer to “give?” Led again by the Holy Spirit, my husband and I decided what our children can give the world is virtue. We focus on growing in virtue all the time, but we choose specific virtues to discuss during Lent. It’s quite simple, pick a virtue for each week and help your children find ways to practice the virtue. This is also a great exercise for adults.
We can’t celebrate Lent without talking about Holy Week. We make sure to take advantage of any and all celebrations offered at our Church that week. Does your Church offer a Seder Meal, Washing of the Feet, Passion play, Good Friday service? Bring your children and let them see Jesus’ Passion played out before them! Our personal favorite is the Exaltation of the Cross on Good Friday. This beautiful tradition includes taking off our shoes and approaching the crucifix to kiss the feet of Jesus. It is so reverent, humble, and moving to participate in.
Here’s to embracing the gifts and opportunities the Catholic Church offers us during this penitential season so that we can better explore new ways to bring our faith alive!